A Father to the Fatherless

Our culture tends to demean men and undermine the important role of fathers, then wonders at the staggering numbers of fatherless and troubled children. Dads who stick it out and stand up for their families play a vital role in their family and their positive impact reverberates throughout society. Likewise, those men who step up to fill someone else’s shoes.

My heart aches for those whose father is not a part of their life and those who lack a healthy relationship with them. My parents separated when I was a baby, so my grandparents raised me until I was nine years old, then my dad. Longing and loneliness gripped me as I watched friends make cards for Mother’s Day while mine was overseas, and I had minimum contact with her. Some people experience an emptiness because their parent has died or is uninvolved in their life. Others suffer due to a parent who is physically present but emotionally absent. For those, life and Father’s Day can be difficult.

A dad who isn’t shouldering his responsibilities needs someone to show him how to be a father. My hope is the good men out there will pray about and consider reaching out as a friend and mentor to a dad in need, or as a male parent figure to someone whose father is missing. Those who need help and seek it display courage.

If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally… (James 1:5 KJV)

Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need. (Hebrews 4:16)

To the parent of a wayward son or daughter, despite the time and love invested in them—God hears our prayers for our prodigals. He loves our children more than we do and works to win their heart and draw them home.

It’s heart-rending being a child or a father unwillingly estranged from each other. I prayed for reconciliation between my brothers and my dad for 36 long, hard years. The Bible says love never fails. God is love, and He broke through. Hold on to hope.

God sees, loves, and aches for those without a father or with one who falls short of their call. For those who don’t know Him, He longs to adopt them as His own son or daughter.

But as many as received him, to them gave he power to become the sons of God, even to them that believe on his name: (John 1:12 KJV)

A father of the fatherless, and a judge of the widows, is God in his holy habitation. (Psalm 68:5 KJV)

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We don’t have to remain victims of circumstance. If you grew up with an absent or abusive father, God can break the cycle of destruction. He wants to heal and help each of us become the person He created us to be.

Sustained anger breeds the bondage of bitterness and corrodes the heart of the one who harbors it. God enables me to exchange resentment toward those who’ve hurt me for compassion toward them. This doesn’t mean allowing abusive behavior to continue. However, when we forgive the offender (even if they are unrepentant and undeserving) it sets us on the path to freedom. A wise friend once told me, “You have the right to be angry, but you don’t have to be.”

But God commendeth his love toward us, that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. (Romans 5:8 KJV)

For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses. (Matthew 6:14-15)

I admire John Finch, author of The Father Effect and founder of The Father Effect Ministries. John was eleven years old when he lost his father to suicide, but rather than remaining victimized by his painful circumstances, he chose to be a victor. John recognized his inability to fix his life, accepted God’s gift of salvation and sonship, and forgave his dad. As a result, John experienced the healing love God offers when we become born again. God rescued John’s life and used his painful past to create a ministry reaching out to rescue, encourage, and equip thousands of fathers and their offspring.

For ye have not received the spirit of bondage again to fear; but ye have received the Spirit of adoption, whereby we cry, Abba, Father. (Romans 8:15 KJV)

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God is the perfect father. He doesn’t fall short like earthly parents do. When we give our hearts and hurts to Him, he accepts us. He forgives—and enables us to forgive others. We can redeem our pain. All things aren’t good, but Scripture says God works all things for the good of those who love Him (Romans 8:28). When I give God my pain, He uses it to instruct and re-route me to the right path and equip me to better relate to and help others. God is always accessible, forever faithful. God never leaves or forsakes His children. He calls us beloved.

And I will be a Father unto you, and ye shall be my sons and daughters, saith the Lord Almighty. (2 Corinthians 6:18 KJV)

For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end. (Jeremiah 29:11 KJV)

*Article updated 6/2025

Scroll for Answer to the 2025 Father’s Day Scavenger Hunt Question

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Resources, Ministries & Songs to Minister Listed Below

NEW RELEASE

Another father and hero I had the honor of interviewing was U.S. Army Chaplain, special needs parent and writer, Brad Lee. Chaplain Lee is a licensed marriage and family therapist and a certified professional life coach. He and his wife Lori have six children. Their second youngest, seven-year-old Kayden, was born with Down Syndrome and recently diagnosed with autism.

In his newly released book. (6/2025) titled Walking with Kayden: A Journey of Faith, Struggle, and Hope, Chaplain Lee shares their journey through the world of special needs.” Recognizing the impact and strain on couples with special needs children, Chaplain Lee says his heart is to minister to their marriages. On his YouTube Channel, Special Needs Marriage and Family, he offers strategies to help navigate the unique challenges these families face.

SONG: Control – Tenth Avenue North

Available on Amazon- The Father Effect: Hope and Healing from a Dad’s Absence

Click for: Movie trailer: The Father Effect Movie

https://www.thefathereffect.com/

From Focus on the Family:

AUDIO: My Dad Was in the Mafia, John Finch on Boundless, from Focus on the Family

The Involved Father, By Glen Stanton 

AUDIO,  (Part 1 of 2):  Overcoming the Father Wound, by Josh McDowell 

The Significance of a Father’s Influence

When Your Child’s Love Language is Quality Time, Dr Gary Chapman on Focus on the Family

Past Father’s Day Post:

I remember Daddy holding my hand as we entered the gates to the botanical gardens, Wrigley’s gum, Elephant Ear pastries, Matchbox cars and … Click to continue to In My Father’s Steps

PRIOR POSTS TO BLESS PARENTS

ANSWER
TO MY FATHER'S DAY SCAVENGER HUNT QUESTION

My “little ones” to whom I wrote my letter on my blog’s homepage are—MY WORDS.

(Only a  writer would do that.)

Now that you know this, you may reread or read it

On my home page under the heading titled
“Journey to Here."

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©2018 Rachael M Colby    Tattoo It On Your Heart