I stood in the kitchen on one of those mornings, feeling suffocated by the pressure of making decisions, afraid of messing up. The weight of responsibility and the barrage of demands overwhelmed me. I felt so distressed because I just couldn’t seem to make all the magic things happen for my children.
God, I’m failing as mother. I feel so inept, Lord.
But then I shook myself, looked at my beloved child and said, “I’m sorry; but all your dreams aren’t going to come true. And that’s OK.”
Yes, I actually said that. I know; it’s not very Disney-ish. But it’s truth!
Let me elaborate. The Bible says, “Delight yourself also in the LORD, And He shall give you the desires of your heart.” Psalms 37:4 NKJV
This is not to be confused with the idea that God will give us everything we want. Jesus is not a genie in a bottle. We can’t just clap our hands in prayer, then snap our fingers, and expect Jesus to do our bidding. Our wish is not His command. This scripture is about allowing God to change our heart, so He can deposit the desire for Him and His will in us. God is a good father. He loves us, and gives us the best according to His plan. He is the Master Weaver and sees the big picture.
So, for all my children who weren’t there that morning, I will say it again. “Darling, Sweetheart, Honey; good morning. Hello, and wake up. I love you with all my heart. But all your dreams aren’t going to come true; and that’s OK. Sometimes it’s a God thing.”
And Lord, I will try to remember to rest in Your Word.
And let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart. Galatians 6:9 NKJV
For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon Me and go and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. And you will seek Me and find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart. Jeremiah 29:11-13 NKJV
“I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will guide you with My eye.” Psalms 32:8 NKJV
A Perfect Mothers Day Gift
Last week the leader of our women’s Bible study asked us to share something we had learned as a mom, or from our moms. I sat terrified as she went around the room, wondering what my teen daughter would say. What if she didn’t have anything to say at all? God, I fall so short!
Finally, her turn came and this is what she said. “My mom taught us to adapt and be resilient, even in situations where we weren’t comfortable. And she really leans on God. When she’s having a bad day, she doesn’t go to anyone else. God is her go-to.”
Wow. Grace, grace, grace. She’s been sick this week and hasn’t been out, so she thinks she hasn’t gotten me a Mothers Day gift. But she did; she was three days early with it. All I really want from my children is for them to see Jesus in me and to love and serve Him. I want them to choose wisdom and apprehend the destiny Jesus has for their lives.
On our way home I thanked her for her kind and gracious words, and apologized for not being a better mom. She looked at me and said, “Why are you apologizing to me?”
“Because I wish I was a better mom. I just want you to know that I love you and I love God… And I’m trying.”
“No one ever thinks you’re not trying mom!” She interrupted.
“Oh. Then we’re good.” 🙂
© 2016 Rachael M Colby Tattoo it On your Heart
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Tattoo It On Your Heart 
I chose this blog entry, Rachael, because of the floral pictures. It’s Liz, from Rings. I can see where you are trying to take your blog. Very heartfelt and obviously something you hope sparks dialog. I’m wondering what would happen if you posed a weekly question, related to a scriptural piece, for your followers to weight in on? Might take things from merely a blogger’s abridged testimonial to a forum for rethinking conventional acceptance of what it means to be a Christian. Then again, maybe this blog is more about your journey. That’s good stuff too. Thanks for asking me to weight in and for sharing.
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Liz, I’ve had something along the lines you are suggesting on my heart for years. Just need some time to pray about it and figure out exactly how I need to set it up. Thanks for stopping by, for your input, and kind words. I will keep you posted. 🙂
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Wow that is very powerful! I loved reading that, very touching. 🙂
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You’re too hard on yourself, Rachael! I don’t know anyone who goes out of their way to be a blessing to their children more than you!
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I beg to differ ma’am. I try, but you need to look in the mirror. You have consistently poured yourself out, not only for your kids but for others as well. The Bible says whatsoever you to to the least of these, you do unto Jesus. Great is your reward in Heaven, Teena. 🙂
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